Being in midlife I see a demand for my time from everywhere: job, family and kids, relatives requiring assistance, household chores, etc. I’m not saying that I don’t have time. I certainly do. The question is: Is this leftover time or is it quality time?
Throughout the day we have chunks of time when we would do something meaningful for ourselves. Unfortunately those slots usually are just leftovers in between tasks we have for the day and it’s hard to do anything meaningful in them.
Everyone has something personal they care about. This could be a hobby, career, a side hustle, local community, a church, etc. This is something that you’re passionate about. You get powered up by this activity.
Sometimes it could happen that you feel there is no time for it because of all other things happening in your life. Then you can feel frustrated and down.
Generally speaking there is no such thing as having or not having time. We always have time. Right question is how we spend it. We need to be proactive with our time. We should decide how we spend our time. You need to dedicate it for the activity you want.
There are few extra steps to make it happen when you’re a family man:
- Express your needs to your most important ones. Explain them that this is important for you personally and it keeps you in better mood which then allows you to better handle other things. Basic emergency rule is to take care about yourself before you can take care about other people. Otherwise you may have not enough strength to help.
- Agree on time you dedicate to your thing. This needs to be “quality” time when you can dive deep into your thing. Also you need to agree it for a long horizon (e.g. for a year). Obviously there will be need to change it once in a while, but it’s much better to deal with exceptions instead of looking for a time slot every month.
- Block this time in your calendar and protect it. When someone asks for anything interfering this block of time, just refuse. I propose having only one exception: emergency. And by this I mean things that can damage your life, life your family, or your closest relatives and friends.
- Track your time blocks until it becomes established habit. Now it’s time to make it a part of your life system. I find that making a habit for things I want to have consistent in my life is the best way to go.
Take care of yourself, take care of your loved ones. Try to have a healthy balance between different areas of your life and enjoy the journey.